Will You Stay? The Emergence of A Mommy
This journal is in the middle of a transition because I’m in transition. I’m no longer a student who’s married and living in a strange land that is Utah, but a girl who’s transitioning into the habits of parenthood and the more languid leisures of adulthood. I’m warning all who read this: this might become somewhat of a mommy-blog. I’ve settled into this fact; my children will be a large part of my life for at least the next twenty years.
Of course, I don’t know how much of my children’s information I’ll impart to you, the public. I’ve seen different approaches from other mommy-blogs I read, but I don’t read them because they are mothers. Some don’t post their children’s faces or their real names, and some do. In any extent, I still hope this will be a good writing source. I’m sure I’ll find moments where I need to escape into the adult world with adult words and thoughts; I’ll have moments where I won’t want to even mention my kids. I’m also sure I’ll need a set of hobbies so that I’m not Constant Mommy; I know beautiful women who have writing careers with their blogs and with free-lancing projects on other blogs and who also have children.
I don’t know how I’ll fit in with them. Rest assured, I don’t think my old interests will die. Not completely. I still love books and theatre and trees. I still enjoy a good link, a pretty and useful product, bright colors and both new and old ideas. I still have a weird sense of humor and share nightly laughs with my best friend right before bed. Those old habits will just change in intensity because I also enjoy kids–I’ve done a large amount of babysitting and I feel like I helped my parents raise my three youngest siblings. Right now, I’m frequently babysitting a toddler named Wyatt as his mom starts her own massage business and am enjoying my interactions with him. He makes me feel competent in my upcoming role.
Heaven knows I’m keeping myself busy, and in the last two weeks, it seems I’m all about nurturing, creating, and enriching. I was feeling rotten yesterday, and I made cinnamon rolls. Last week was full of sewing projects to accommodate a larger bowling ball. I acquired another plant from my grandfather’s funeral on Monday. and it joins the beautiful green out on my balcony; most of the plants I don’t know the names of and will probably Freecycle when September rolls around, but the summer wealth of growth seems to mirror that of the growing fetus inside me. I’m loving a new digital TV channel called Create, and the shows I most frequently catch are cooking shows.
I hope you’ll stick with me as I discover what parenthood is like, and how I change in spite of it or within the role. It truly is an adventure, and the course of this blog is unknown.